Cultural Awareness

Tio and Christian live on the back part of the property that we are renting. Their country of origin is Guatemala. About 12 -15 years ago, Patty was caring for her aging mother, aunt, and uncle. She needed more help and found Jacob, more affectionately called Tio (the Spanish word for uncle) who helped her care for her family. Tio has stayed on through the years and is very much responsible for a lot of the yard and garden work that goes on here as well as caring for the horses. From our conversations with him, he speaks very good English, has a big heart and is willing to do anything, carry in groceries, wash the car, and always stops what he's doing to see if we need something, etc... Instinctively from day one I knew he was okay. Some of you know that I easily "read" people and have a realistic feel immediately for a person. Tio is a good man.

From what I could gather from a conversation with him last week, he left home about 18 years ago. In their culture they live in extended family groups, all together under one roof or a series of homes. His brother tried to kill him, he showed me scars, so he left and came to the states. He may have also left to find work. He came legally and received his green card and has worked for a living all these years. He faithfully sends money home every week. If you're following this, you've already figured out he has not seen his family all these years. They want him to come there and he wants them to come here. It is evident that he still has close relations as they talk by phone every day. Patty provides him a place to live, cable, cell phone, electricity, water, and buys all his food. She provides medical care if needed. He doesn't drive so he leaves the property when she takes him somewhere, usually they are working together on the grounds at another house she is fixing up. I'm sure that the money he earns here would not seem like a lot to us, but is a considerable amount in their country.

He asked me exactly how many children we had the first day we were here and I discovered through that converstation that he has 8, six sons and two daughters. Two of his children live here, one in San Francisco and a son, Christian who appeared here about a year ago. Christian is willing to work for Patty, though he doesn't seem as happy about it as his dad and he goes each Sunday to visit his brother in the city. This is where the immigration issue gets so complicated.

Tio came here legally and is "naturalized" whatever that means. He is a hard-working man who likes what he's doing and would do anything anyone asks of him. He is teaching the children many Spanish words and is very much enjoying them. I have become very fond of him and when we talk I try to say as much as I am able in Spanish out of respect for his culture. He has definitely become part of the Stice Family. Any evening you can find John and Patty with Tio and Christian watching TV together in the back in one of the "barns" (also from the old property the house came from) which has been fixed up as a living area. John and Patty are staying here now, temporarily, in the back in a motor home while they are waiting for the house they were in to be worked on. We have been invited several times "behind the fence" of the garden to their private areas there and now feel quite comfortable opening one of the many gates and calling "Tio, there's a package here for Patty" or as the little ones did today running at top speed, "Tio the pond's overflowing and the fish are getting out." I found out about this later of course after they went screaming for him. (This is another story for another post.)

So what do you do about immigration in this country? If immigrants were all like Tio and wanted to work and wanted to do their share, I wouldn't have an issue with it. If they don't and want us to pay for their every need, I do. But not everyone can make it in this country on a small salary unless they have an arrangement like Tio does. What then? And where do you draw the line? Tio probably can't go home because he probably couldn't get back in, at least not easily. But what about his family? Wouldn't it be nice for him to be able to visit? or for them to come here? But who comes to stay? Do you let someone in because their husband and father is here? Do you let them in because this husband and father works but not this other one because theirs doesn't? And how do immigration officials know? We sit in our homes and have such drastic opinions about all of this but we don't really know anything. Now that I see not just faces on the news or in the paper, but know them and see the pain on their face when they mention their family, both the good family and the bad, I have more compassion for this issue. There is no way to regulate without mandates. Mandates help and hurt. Laws help and hurt. There is no way with this large of an issue to look at each case individually to make decisions. This is why this will probably never be fully resolved in our country. It is not as simple as it seems.

For now, we stay shut away from the "real world" behind our closed gate of a life, literally. Today I sat in the yard and listened as Tio educated the children on the dangers of rattlesnakes. He taught them the Spanish word for it and didn't quit until he was satisfied they knew it. He explained how he wants them to immediately come get him if they see any snakes. Then he turned to me and explained how he will let nothing and no one hurt my babies. You don't get much closer to me than that. I am wondering if there are any more Tios out there, I will be glad to take one home with me.

Scott finally figured out how to ask Christian in Spanish if he wanted to play soccer with him.